Monday, February 11, 2013

To be totally honest...

I know I've been doing these a lot lately. But it's therapeutic. I swear. 
At least for me. 
And I LOVE reading all of your comments. 
So, to be totally honest:

-Sometimes binging on chocolate for an hour feels so good that I hit some kind of euphoria and don't care how much weight I gain afterwards. 
-I've literally been on the couch from 5pm until now (10:00) because I keep telling myself that I can't physically get up. I better not have to pee soon. 
-Victoria's Secret commercials piss me off. 
-I've been letting Jude wreak havoc around the house with washable crayons because I admire his free artistic spirit. 
-When did we all start taking ourselves so gosh darn seriously? Get your panties out of a knot, you psycho. 
-A few days ago Jude squatted down to poop and I ran him to the toilet and he cried the whole time. 
-I have an obsession with online shopping and returning everything when it gets here. 
-There's been a bagged-up newspaper in front of my door for the past 3 weeks and I'm afraid to throw it away in case it's not mine. 
-I often deflect the creepy, wandering hands of my old, male patients just in the nick of time. 
-I'm not entirely sure what store-bought meatballs are made of. 
-Today I had my first bite of liverwurst and nearly died. 
-I have some pretty sick stretch marks all over my stomach and whenever I look at them in dismay I think, "You're a tiger, dammit. You earned those stripes."
-Nearly every time I go grocery shopping, I come home and think, in triumph, "You're welcome, family. Now we won't starve." 
-I'm terrified of tsunamis and even get uneasy sitting near lakes. 
-When I was 11 I saved all of my baby teeth in my jewelry box. You know, for special occasions. 

Ok, now be honest with me. 


  1. How can anyone compete? I don't know whether to be terrified by your thoughts or hysterical.
    -The constant thought in my head is, "what will be my next meal, and more importantly when?"
    -My day is off a bit unless I have a nice, long bowel movement in the morning.
    -I bought store bought meatballs and they were delicious. They are made of....
    -Sometimes I wish there were a rent a baby program. You know, so I could sleep in, watch TV at all available moments and go out to dinner whenever I darn well please.
    -I wanted to prove to my parents that I could do anything, so on our drive to Disneyland when I was 6 or so, I swallowed a penny. Let's just say, bad idea.

  2. I have some majorly huge zits coming. Like tumors coming off my face. And they really hurt.

    Stopping breastfeeding has restarted my period, which makes me want to get pregnant again so I don't have to deal with that fun part of being a girl.

    I hate wet socks, I have to take them off and get new ones immediately.

    Ashlyn pees in the car every time. Every time. I have stopped washing her carseat because I know she will just pee in it again.

    I wish I could go back to diapers sometimes for Ashlyn. I get so sick of cleaning up pee.

  3. Please don't ever stop doing these posts. I love them!

    Dishes and bathrooms ... ugh, please don't make me clean them

    I often throw things in the general direction of the trash can and purposefully don't look if they make it so I don't have to get up and fix it when they don't

    I don't care for art - my home is decorated entirely of photos of my family

    Today my snack was nutella and coke

    Sometimes I let Aaron watch "cars" 3x in a row

    If I get dinner made I feel like my day has been worth it and I have accomplished a lot

    Since it is dark and dreary and we only have one car, I can go 2 weeks without leaving the apartment (only to go grocery shopping or if I feel well enough to make it to church)

    I don't turn on the lights if I can avoid it and when I do, Aaron runs in circles jumping excitedly.

  4. Hey I'm a tiger too! So that makes two of us! And sometimes I eat like crap. I'm talking chocolate and cookies. Sometimes that's all I eat and surprisingly lose weight, but I sometimes do it in hiding so my child doesn't see it and get bad eating habits. I make sure he eats healthy! :)

  5. To be totally honest, I made up a bunch of crap to do yesterday so that my visiting teacher wouldn't come over and see my mess of a house. I went and did said crap so I wouldn't be lying, so my house is still a mess, and I have no intention of doing anything but blog stalking, facebook creeping, and pinterest pinning today.
    To be totally honest, I never get dressed before noon. The main reason get out of pajamas is to pick up Sienna, and if I'm being really honest, 99% of the time, I just put on a shirt and leave the yoga pants. I'm not getting out of the car so whats the point.
    To be totally honest, I hate grammar snobs. Get over yourselves. Half the reason I never really do facebook status updates is out of fear of using the wrong their, there, they're, and it's a real fear. Stupid Nazis.
    To be totally honest, these are my favorite blog posts of yours, and I could live without the picks of your perfect face and body because they give me a DUFF complex.

  6. *pics, just in case you're a Nazi and I didn't know it.

  7. Oh I looooove this. Totally going to write a post inspired by you! So i'll save my bits of honesty for that...but I will say a few of yours had me nodding my head cause I've been there too, and a few made me laugh! Goodness I love your writing.

    VS commercials drive me crazy too...and so do the sexy Carl's Jr commercials as of late. :/ Random right? One even came up during Modern Family...arrrgg. Yep, I'm a prude.

    Washable crayons sound awesome! Loved that Vine video you posted of his little masterpieces. Totally getting some for Brooks, I think he'd love them. :)

    Glad you're a fast dodger with those sneaky old man hands. yowza. ;)

    I don't know what frozen meatballs are made of either...but I love them nonetheless.

    I get uneasy near lakes too...but that's because I have weird thing called lakebottomphobia.

    Your baby teeth collection totally cracked me up. ;)


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