Friday, April 20, 2012

I wonder…



-I wonder if watching a mediocre show to give them one pity rating is making a difference.
-I wonder if Nutella is infused with crack.
-I wonder if the 2 girls on my chest will go back to normal.
-I wonder if spaghetti squash knows it's cousins with regular spaghetti.
-I wonder if giving Jude that one green jelly bean is what turned his poop green.
-I wonder if makeup flies off my face like dust and that's why I look perpetually worse throughout the day.
-I wonder if my grandma kept any of her shoes.
-I wonder if I should keep some of my shoes.
-I wonder if Cookie Crisp cereal is the bread crumbs of cookies.
-I wonder if ants would explode in the microwave.
Just tried it. Didn't work.
-I wonder why birds come back so early after winter when they're just going to get rained on for 2 months.
-I wonder if I should take "can check blood sugar in 5 seconds" off my resume.
-I wonder if Cheez Whiz is just orange butter.
-I wonder if I should write Ellen and tell her that I deserve lots of money because my baby wakes up too early every morning.
-I wonder if Volvo would let me test drive their most expensive car.
-I wonder if high school boys think I'm attractive.
-I wonder how many spiders I've accidentally eaten in my life.
-I wonder if Adam secretly resents that I don't have a bigger booty.

What do you wonder? 

2 comments:

  1. I wonder why Haidyn won't stop crying.
    I wonder if Ashlyn will start repeating the things we hear as we watch the Office.
    I wonder if I looked more vulnerable while out walking with the girls that creepy guy would have chased me.
    I wonder why none of our neighbors are ever outside.
    I wonder how many women keep a their bikini area waxed after marriage and kids.

    ReplyDelete
  2. This is hilarious.
    -I wonder who decided 8-5pm was a normal workday...
    -I wonder why everyday cannot feel like Friday.
    -I wonder why eating a cookie has to make me fat.
    -I wonder how forever 21 has such low prices.
    -I wonder why certain body parts always smell.

    ReplyDelete

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